SweetKitten08

Hi! My name is Holly. I'm 26 years old & Christian. I'm a Lesbian. My fave colors are black, white, gray (grey), brown & green. I am from Gettysburg,Pennsylvania United States! I am a small town girl seeking a new life & new beginning. Gettysburg is a small, poor, haunted, & historical town cause of the Civil War & Battle of Gettysburg occurring there years ago. It's said to be the"Most haunted town in America!" true fact. It's a nice little town.

My twin brother Alex is Mixed Martial Arts Fighter & a USA Marine! We and myself are so proud of him for becoming a Marine. He's my fave brother and best friend! Anyways,continuing on. . .We are both High School Graduates (from different schools). i graduated June 6, 2008. i can't remember when my brother graduated. just my graduation. I am an English Major in School. Not kidding. I got 18 A+s in English 12. English 11 was a bit harder for me, but i made it through it, somehow.

Soon after graduating high school, i got my first job at a local market store in our town Gettysburg. i worked in the store's deli area. i enjoyed the whole experience of it! And got paid well for working as much i did there, which was part-time. $8.00 an hour! i miss that job. i no longer work there or any job at the moment, currently.

My parents divorced soon after i got my job. i, then, had a horrible event occur with then. i had a "psychotic break." i began hearing voices in my head. they caused me to experience a mental breakdown at home! i had to go to the hospital, in the Emergency Room there. They ran some tests to make sure that nothing else was causing it. They told us that i needed to go to medical doctors for treatment. They diagnosed me with schizoaffective disorder, bipolar disorder, anxiety disorder, and depression disorder. Everything fell apart at that moment. i was on medicine for the problems i was experiencing then. i began to see places where I've been, like home (before the divorce happened.) the voices were horrible and i was freaking out badly! i'd stomp on the ground and banged my fist on the kitchen table when i was struggling with everything, and i called my mom "a traitor!" i didn't mean it though. i heard Satan tell me that i wasn't going to "cross over." Something like that. Everything changed in a very bad way. I couldn't stop crying and freaking out! i couldn't control myself. I had never experience something like this mental illnesses issues before! I never thought it'd happen to me! i'd put puzzles together to help calm me down. That was very bad too. i bawled my eyes out and once again freaked out! As if i could control it! which i couldn't. i changed medicine when others wouldn't help my problems. I got the side-effects of each medicines the doctor prescribed me. In fall 2009 i had to go to a mental hospital for a few days. That was a huge nightmare for me and my family, who visited me there. When i was released from the hospital, i was like "Thank God!"

Ever since then i've been getting shots for the voices and medicine to help with all of it. I go to therapy/counseling and a medical doctor too. I guess you can say that i've improved since then. Thank goodness! *update* i no longer get shots. i got new medicine & more treatment.

Right now, i live with my mom and cats in Gettysburg. My dad lives in Elizabethtown, Pennsylvania with girlfriends (and one of the women he married and then divorced cause the relationship with them went wrong for him). He is with a very awesome woman who is really nice and funny! My twin brother Alex lives on his own in different places that he moves to when needed. We visit him and he visits us. He's a really cool, funny, caring, loving, and amusing. My mom, who i live with, and i volunteer at our nearby SPCA animal shelter to socialize with the animals & cats there. It's a great stress-reliever and we love being there with them. I always joke with my mom that we'd adopt another cat! LOL.XD

i'm a BIG fan of Penn State, Baltimore Ravens, San Jose Sharks, Philadelphia Flyers, and Hershey, PA Bears. They're sports teams that i became a BIG fan of.

My fave music bands are My Chemical Romance, Evanescence, We are the Fallen, Within Temptation, Disturbed, etc.

I would like to be an author of poetry & stories (novels), a veterinarian or a vet technician as my dream careers. Too Bad that they can't be careers, though i may be able to write stories (novels) or poetry. I did write some stories and poetry in high school years ago. I don't anymore cause my mental issues are interfering with me doing them. It's hard to do stuff i used to do and enjoy anymore cause of my mental health issues affecting me so much all the time, leaving me with no confidence, interest, thoughts, or self-esteem to even try to do them anymore. It's very sad.

I am anti-social and can't leave the house without my family with me. I've tried programs that were said to help me. They didn't help me at all! They only made things worse for me no matter what i did as programs. i don't want to do them again! Never! I only trust my family & like spending all my time with them, instead of going places with other people. People scare me! I may have paranoia issues too. I'm not crazy or bad with all of this. I'm a really good person, honest. I'm funny, sweet, kind, friendly, & someone who tries to make everyone & animals happy in order for me to be happy myself. I'm basically an emo woman who is also an outcast, loner, and outsider. Sad but true. I always have been that way, growing up and nowadays. I was always bullied by others for no reason. I didn't really have any friends, just one good friend i went to school with years ago. (We are no longer friends at the moment.).

That's pretty much it. There's not much else to say about me right now.

If you like to know more about me, feel free to ask/talk to me! Bye for now!